Chapter 48: Hysterectomy Surgery Paperwork

Hi fam,

Sorry for the delay the past few weeks. There has been a lot happening behind the scenes that have been pulling my attention a different way as of late. Not to mention I haven't really been in the writing mindset. As entertaining im sure this is to all of you, it certainly is a lot more than just humorous entertainment for myself. As you can imagine its a cleansing, h3ll a purge of the soul if you will. That being said, my mind and heart have to be in the right place, to be authentically myself and haven't really been lately, but are right now.

Anywhoo, hello all. Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all, dang the year flew by super fast and slow all at the same time. This week I actually saw a really funny meme that said "wow this week has been a really hard year". 😂 H3ll I feel that applies to the past 2 years at least, thanks covid and whatever other aspects of this dumpster fire i've lived the past few years.😊 Enter sarcastic tone here. 

So in the last post, I wrote about not being able to freeze my eggs. Bummer for sure, and yes I said bummer. Feel free to keep your "boomer" comments to yourself. I may look young, but im certainly a cranky old hag at heart 😂 At this point I have already made the decision to have the hysterectomy, and it really was just a matter of moving forward and get the surgical paperwork completed. So off to the hospital I went.

By now this was a song and dance I could in my sleep at this point. Seeing as I've been back and forth to PMH so much, it was like a second home to me. Except the fridge wasn't stocked with month old salad dressing, freezer burned mixed veggies, and pizza pockets. Its stocked with chemo medications, and the liquid medication aka contrast that they use for CT- scans. 😒 Oh wait i'm gluten free now, so lets replace pizza pockets with Amy's gluten free breakfast burritos. Weird I know, but actually. really really good. I cant say the same for the beef and cheese burrito, but the breakfast one is good for sure. 😜 

So I got to the hospital and luckily for me I was not longer scared of meeting any serial killers in the parking garage. Why you ask? well not only have I been there enough times to know where they most likely  will be hiding, aka in the sketchy parking structure. Also I no longer was scared of dying. Mind you I never really was, but now at this point it felt so real, h3ll. If this is how I was to go, then might as well go out with a fight like a total bada$$, bring it on Kruger. 🥷🤺

Nevertheless, I arrived at the hospital. I went through the typical screener process that we've all done at least 3.8 million times prior. I got up to the gynaecology office, and once again started the ever so fun, yet all too common patient waiting room game. At least an hour to 2 hours later, they called me in for my appointment. 

As I proceeded to the second waiting room, I couldn't help but think of how much I didnt really want to be there, yet had no choice. Throughout this entire situation I felt as though I had completely no control of anything. Which mind you was one of the hardest parts, being a self proclaimed "control freak". This whole journey has certainly taught me so many different things over the last little while. Sometimes you have to let go no matter how much you really don't want to. There are somethings in life where you have no choice but to step back, breathe, and put on your big girl panties and take on the day. 💪 As far as I was concerned, this whole situation was just that.

Eventually Dr. F walked in, sat down and greeted me. She then confirmed with me that I had decided to have the hysterectomy surgery. All I could think of while she began to ask me all the routine questions was about how much I didn't really want to be there and yet I had no choice in the matter really. Probably one of the best ideas i've ever gotten was to actually record the appointment. Too bad it took a while to be able to figure that one out but hey I got there. Mind you, despite the fact of actually recording what our conversation was after listening to it about 16 different times I still couldn't tell you what was said. Honestly! It was like Dr. F was competing in the qualifier round in the fast talking olympics. Seriously, I couldn't help but wonder when she was going to come up for air. That being said, If I were to be in the olympics what would I do?.....hmm.....definitely not any running thats a guarantee, I run for no one. Except ice cream, I will run for ice cream.😂 Anywhoo, I think I would like a shot put. makes sense if you think about it a great stress reliever. Just grab something heavy and chuck it as far as humanly possible. Certainly something I can get down with doing.

Nevertheless, there was a lot of words spoken in sentences that seem to sound like the English language that were coming out of her mouth. However no matter how much I tried, I couldn't seem to make sense of any of it. Well, some of it, but mostly none of it if im truly honest.

Before I knew it, the permission forms were signed and it was just a waiting game for when I would actually get a surgery date. One thing that I did remember was her saying that best case scenario she would be doing my surgery. But there was also a possibility that another surgeon would be doing the surgery as well. Due to the time sensitive nature of my situation, Dr. F basically said no matter who is doing the surgery, take the earliest available date. Period.

Till next post!