Chapter 25: From the Couch to Zumba!

Whaddup Ladies and Gents,

Welcome back to another post about my ever eventful life journey. I know as of late i've been posting a lot about my cancer journey, seeing as well....theres just too much not to tell! I thought maybe this week I would switch it up and talk a little, or a lot in my case, about my weightloss journey.

As I previously mentioned, i've been overweight my entire life. Actually, no, Let's call a spade a spade. Ive been morbidly obese, most, if not all of my life. I could go into a long winded debate about a nature versus nurture scenario, but what's the point really. What has happened, happened. Which is partially why I wanted to discuss this particular topic on this blog of mine.

It was always so easy for me not to exercise and just stay on the couch watching the trashiest dumpster fires on tv. Which often consisted of any of the 90 day fiancé episodes, or even the Kardashians for that matter. Back when I used to still live with my mom, she would always get so mad when I would watch that stuff and tell me to turn it off. However, what she and others don't seem to understand is, the reason why I actually watch those shows. Are they interesting? sometimes. Are they ridiculous? 100, 000%! but most importantly, are they a coping mechanism for me to not have to think about how sh*tty my own life really is, and focus on something else in the meantime? absolutely. Now that I think about it, no wonder I love reality tv so much. Big brother, Smothered, 90 day fiancé, The circle, masked singer, etc. Anything to escape my own reality I guess.

Ive never been a big workout person. Ive never been one to want to go to the gym because it was something "fun to do". 😐 EWWW.  Everyone has their strengths, and well I can certainly tell you that is not mine. 😉 HA. So how did I get to where I am now, having dropped 100 lbs you ask? To be completely honest I really have no idea. Your guess is a good as mine! What I can tell you all for sure though, is that it was certainly A LOT of trial and error. Each person has an individual journey, but what I can tell you is. the one thing every journey has in common, 100% of each journey will not be a completely linear one. Be patient, kind, and understanding with yourself. There will be days where you will want to eat a pint of strawberry cheesecake haagen daas ice cream for breakfast.  Oreos and  a large bag of Ms. Vicky's spicy Dill chips for lunch. Then a  large pepperoni pizza for dinner, and as a top off, halo top ice cream for "dessert". I may or may not be speaking from personal experience. I was talking about a "friend" I swear. 😏 One of the hardest things about this whole process is not just learning self discipline, but also implementing it as well. Which in turn will help you increase your own self worth in the long run. One of the most important things i've learned in my 36 years of life is, people will only treat you, how you allow them, same goes for yourself as well.

For years I told myself every excuse in the book of why I wasn't actually exercising. Wether it was work, the commute, I was "too tired", or I already had plans to ride a live African elephant in the Sahara at 9am the next morning. So naturally, I had to save all of my already diminishing energy for that.🐘🐘 There was just never any time. But the truth was however, I just never really wanted to make the time. Seeing as if you really wanted to actually do something, you would always make time for it in your life no matter what it is. Including riding elephants, or h3ll even a unicorn if you wanted it bad enough.🦄🦄

Now, as I was saying, from the couch to Zumba?! Truly baffles my mind as well, now that I think about it. Ive tried many things in my day when it came to exercising. As i've mentioned before, i'm not one to be a "gym rat" by any stretch of the imagination. Ive learned the only exercising I somewhat "like" doing, is when you don't feel like your doing it at all. Seems to be the trick that has worked for me. Many other people will often tell you to start with walking. "Just for work a walk, start there and before you know it you will be running a 10K". Im sorry what?! nope. As someone who goes out of their way to purposely take the elevator 1 floor, I doubt that will be the case for me any time soon. However, what I can say is i've always felt conflicted. That my mind had the energy but my body could not keep up. Realistically being 425 lbs at my heaviest, my husband would ask me to go for walks with him and I physically wouldn't be able to.  Mainly because I would be in so much pain after not even 10 mins.  Even going up a flight of stairs would have me wishing for an oxygen tank and a towel to wipe off all the sweat in places I dare not name. Unfortunately, this was my reality!

So what changed? well, I knew deep in my soul I would not be able to be pregnant and give birth to a healthy child at that weight. I needed to change, not just for my husband, my unborn child, but for myself. As you can Imagine I was like a ticking heart attack/stroke time bomb about to go off at any moment, but I was the only one who would be able to "cut the blue wire" and detonate it. I needed help. BAD......

So knowing I wanted to make a change, a drastic one at that, how or where was I to start. I knew that if I made too many changes all at once, then naturally it would be a recipe for failure. One step at a time. The first change I made, was in my mind the biggest one, diet. I knew that with the weight I was, there was no way I would be able to do any exercises, my body just wouldn't allow it.  At first I pretty much ate the same, but simply just measured everything I was eating. To get a better Idea of what a portion size was. I then slowly made changes as my palate changed. I.e. greek yoghurt instead of sour cream or diet juice/pop instead of the regular stuff. Which in turn eventually changed to just water.

All in all it took me a while to slowly make these changes but I was able to, mainly because I loved myself enough to do so. Don't get me wrong I still have my "indulging meals" once a week, till this day. Even though they may look a little different now, but  rest assured, they are certainly still there.

Where did the exercise come in? well.....to be completely honest much like everyone else during the start of the pandemic. I no longer had an excuse! I was working from home, and getting h3lla stir crazy and needed to do something, so I did. Mind you, by this time I had already dropped 68 lbs just from changing my eating habit's. Goes to show you how many Big Mac's and Pizza I was eating eh? The reality was though, even some of the most "simplest" workouts/exercises I was wanting to try or that I found online were way too hard for me. How or where would someone like me even begin. Well, I'll be honest friends. I do not advise anyone to do this by any means i.e. do as I say not as I do. However what I found worked for me was, before every time I exercised, I took 2 extra strength Tylenol. That was the only way I was able to do any kind of workout. After a while once my body became used to the movement, I didn't have to take the Tylenol anymore and was able to still enjoy the workouts.

Its important to find what works for you. Once you do, chances are you are going to stick to it. I found myself starting with a Zumba DVD, mainly because it didn't feel like exercise. Zumba 101- Cant dance? is what its actually called. To be honest, its pretty fast and a hell of a workout. At the beginning most of the time I found myself not following along and just dancing to the music. Its not like the Zumba police were gonna show up at my door. Even if they did, c'mon in! I wouldn't mind the 1on 1 attention, I might actually learn how to do it properly👯

Nevertheless, I started doing that once a week. Then worked my way unto twice a week. Unfortunately, due to the stress it put on my knees, I couldn't do it more than that. But I knew I wanted to continue to challenge myself. So I looked for other exercises that I would be able to do. For anyone I would recommend any "low impact" workouts. Just because your not jumping around like your in a mosh pit at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert, doesn't mean your not gonna sweat like menopausal woman with no water, during an august heatwave, in the dessert. If you know...you know. Dont worry ladies, I know.

So I did a little research and I found the most amazing YouTube channel. It's the Team Body project YouTube channel. They have a variety of workouts from very low impact for beginners to high interval training. I certainly recommend this to everyone to check out! I also wanted to try yoga as well, once I felt more comfortable. Seeing as all the exercising and dancing I was doing wasn't leaving much to the imagination in terms of my flexibility. In no way was I able to do even the easiest of yoga poses. Luckily for me I found the most amazing yoga on YouTube as well!

Team body Project YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFjc9H89-RpWuIStDqhO7AQ

Bigger body yoga:

https://youtu.be/zUnjJdJitPwYouTube

Feel free to check out the above links and I hope you find something each of you can use. Hopefully you enjoy them as much as I do. Remember it's not about how you get there, it's about loving yourself enough to want to put in the work to try and get there. Eventually you will arrive to where you hoped you'd be!

Feel free to comment and let me know what exercises or workouts you like to do, id love some new ideas!

Until next Monday friends......